Palm of His Hand

I guess I'm gonna be alright, Lord. This is a safe place to be.

This art work is by a friend in the U.K. Richard Lyall, better known as Pilgrim's Progress. I love this man's creativiy, and would love to learn how it is done someday.

I will rest well tonight for sure ! Thanks Lord, and thank you to Richard as well.Bless you.

Last Day.

My car is packed nearly to the roof, but I am ready to depart early in the morning. Yvonne, Anneka and I spent a lovely afternoon at a carnival.

I rode the ferris wheel with Anneka, and Yvonne was brave enough to embark on the Pirate Ship, where she nearly volunteered to walk the plank.(She was a funny shade of green when she disembarked.)

Meanwhile Anneka smiled broadly through every single ride. It was so fun to watch this child be so fearless, where I would be throwing up .

A lovely kiss from the Lord to be with family on my last day in the city. Tonight I am cosy with Julie and the boys, and in a few hours , hopefully after a good nights rest, I will be on the road.

Prayers gratefully recieved for the next few days.

Amazing Moving Day

It seems to me that the Lord is very busy these days, shifting His people into strategic positions, as the Winds of His Spirit,move across the planet.

I just liked this picture, and I have a friend who is named Nancy as well, who can relate to the joke. I met this lovely friend last year in the Simeon Company. Our stories are very similar, and how we have been travelling across the land , surrendered to the Holy Spirit, while feeling like we were living out of our cars.

Hey there Nancy, I hope you are well my friend.I am thinking of you tonight.

Anyway....today I finished up my 'time' in my apartment. Jason and Yvonne and the girls dropped by to pick up some furniure. While helping Jay, I bumped my face, and popped a rib. (ouch)It slipped back in but ,man, that was a strange feeling.

Later another friend dropped by , and was kind enough to help me finish up. I had to bring some stuff to Julie's , where I will be staying until Tuesday, when I leave.
She is away, and had left me a key. I opened the door, no problem. Dropped some things on the table as well as my car keys, and went out for another load.

Oops! the door locked behind me, and we were locked out. I had no last names, no phone contacts, and no phone anyway.
What did this 'mature'grandmother do? Well, I broke in. Yep! Climbed up on a chair, with help from my friend/accomplice, and shinied through a kitchen window, over the sink, and climbed down from the cupboard, waiting to see if the sirens were coming.

I don't know if it was really break and enter since I did have the key, just not on me. Anyway...nothin! No one even seemed to notice, and it was broad daylight.
I commented to my friend, that was way too easy.
It should not be that easy to break into a house. I will have to talk to my daughter about getting her windows made more secure. On the other hand , 'this one time' I am glad I was able to get in.

Now, Sam is trying to prove to the two cats here, that 'he's the man', and that they should respect that. Ha! No way. So I referee again. Oh well, I am too tired to care much tonight.
It was a good day, satisfying in the awareness that Jesus is so Near, whispering His encouragement and blessing in the preparations for our departure. I am not looking forward to the two day drive east, but once I get going , it seems to be o.k.



'Unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it abides alone, but if it dies, it bears much fruit. I will miss my family here, especially the grandbabies, as Bevy calls them with affection. I will miss Sanctuary House of Prayer. There is always a dying , but this kind leads to Life Himself. So I am content, and looking forward to Fresh Beginnings.

Oil Change and Ecstatic Wonder

The other day, I took my car in for an oil change, after my return from K.C. and to prepare for the long drive east next week.I decided to sit and wait, since I had my buddy Sam with me.
While in the office, the reading material in a garage being either car stuff, or Cosmo...go figure....I noticed a little newspaper on the counter. It was the Ukrainian Catholic News......much better, thank you Lord.

I found an article in English, that blessed me , so I am going to quote a bit of it. It is written by Very Reverend John Breck. The title ?

Ecstatic Wonder: The Myrrhbearing Women. Now you know why it grabbed my attention.

"Myrrhbearing Women, having beheld the empty shroud and heard the angelic testimony, were filled with trembling and astonishment - tromos kai ekstasis, more precisely rendered 'ecstatic wonder'.

It was this intense emotional response that led them to flee the tomb and , for a while to say nothing to anyone, 'for they were afraid'.

These women had followed Jesus faithfully throughout the time of His earthly ministry, caring for His needs, providing food and lodging for Him and His disciples.

They remained faithful to Him throughout His passion, and they assisted in His burial. After the Sabbath, they returned to the tomb to complete the burial ritual.

Very early on the first day of the week, the women gathered aromatic spices and walked to the tomb. Finding the stone rolled away, they entered with trepidation.

There they beheld a young man and angelic figure, seated where the body of Jesus had been laid, where now there was only an empty shroud.Then filled with trembling and astonishment, with 'ecstatic wonder', they fled from the tomb, struck dumb by the vision that had just been granted to them.

This fear that came upon them was the experience of awe so deep and intense that they became 'beside themselves', removed from the usual sphere of human experience,and granted the degree of self-transcending wonder that the apostle Paul knew when He was 'caught up into the third heaven', into Paradise.

Such is the emotion that accompanies the experience of a theophany, a revelation of Divine Power and Majesty.This is the emotion that seized the women at the empty tomb.
They saw, they were amazed, and they left the tomb in a spirit of wonder and awe filled silence."

What struck me about this story is this. I have read the gospel accounts for many years, and never thought much about these women, except perhaps the one account where Jesus appeared to Mary, as the Gardener. These women were given a supernatural experience that left them in awe, wonder, and trembling with holy fear.

I can be so familiar with Jesus, as He meets me humbly in my every day life. I need to be reminded just Who He really is sometimes, this Mighty King of Glory full of Power and Majesty, who loves me and meets me in a garage while getting my Oil changed.

I want my emotions to respond to the Truth of Jesus, even in the little things. I desire a heart overflowing with worship and thanksgiving at the Nearness He grants to me every day. Thank You Lord , I love You so much!

Moving On

Sitting here tonight remembering last Friday. I was physically present in the Prayer Room , fully engaged with the Lord. Wonderful!

At this moment I am somewhat farther away physically, but my heart is moved as I agree with the heart songs ascending before the Throne. The bowls are singing, and the bowls above, are filling at the same time, as I listen to the Prayer Room live.

God is so Amazingly Loving and Tender tonight. I need Him so much, and I am thankful for the hunger in my heart that reaches beyond my world and nurtures His longing for me .

I hear Him singing over me . How amazing is that ! It is good to lean this way. His Gaze kindles a fire in my heart that will never be snuffed out.

Finally I am recovering from the long drive home, and have tried to get motivated to pack for the next mile in my incredible adventure with God.

It seems that no matter how often I try to downsize my 'stuff', I still have way too much.

While I was in K.C. my job was secured, even before the interview. Another 'kiss' from the Lord. He is so Great and Full of surprises. I am very thankful and very blessed.

The picture above is by Oliver
I love his work. Very powerful visuals that speak to my heart .

One More Day

One day left . I have been enjoying my time here so very much, just marinating in the Presence of the Lord. It has been wonderful to see so many familiar faces, and engage with the Lord in many fun encounters and conversations.

Lots of good friends, good food, really good 'fruffy store' shopping, and such a great God to share the experience with as well.

I will depart early Wednesday, and pick up Sam late that evening. I wonder how late the duty free shop is open at the border?

It's not fun to leave, but necessary, with the promise of returning another day.
He is Faithful to accomplish that which He has promised .The adventure continues!

Love 's Treasure

He goes out of His way for the out of the way ones.

Seven Years

Today we are celebrating the seven year anniversary of the first prayer meeting that began here in a little trailer down the street. The beginning of day and night, praise, worship, intercession, and I am here. That is very cool God !

Son Light

,
Let the Light of YOUR FACE Shine on my heart......AND LET ME FEEL IT!

Sometimes I need to let Jesus clear away the clutter, that He may get in to those places hidden deep in the shadows of my heart.

He is way better at 'house keeping' than I could ever be. Thank You Jesus.

Sonshine Today

The Kansas city weather did not disappoint today. It was around 80 degrees, sunshine, flowers, green everywhere. It's called Life , if I remember correctly. The green is lush and rich looking and shouts welcome home.

Well, actually, the funny thing is , it feels like I never left here at all, unless I look at my battle wounds, but I won't.

Today I was able to spend nearly eight hours in the prayer room, and Misty's set tonight was an amazing taste of musical genius. I am sure the Lord was playing every guitar, and drum on stage. At least it sounded like it. Such excellence, and Holy Spirit deposits in abundance. What a sweet kiss of heaven.

I noticed a lot of familiar faces and many more new ones, with the latest group of interns finishing up. They kind of take over the eight to ten intercession set, and the increase in the Presence was noticable as they were all focused on the same thing at the same time.

Sometimes during the days and evenings the students are doing their assignments etc, so the corporate focus is not the same .
During the intercession times though it is different as I think they are required to participate, but I am not sure on that one.
Whatever the case the time was excellent, and I am sure the Lord was smiling today again as His kids were giving Him joy.

My friend Gerry and I watched a video called Obsession, on radical Islam. I am sure if we Christians prayed with the fervor and passion that these souls do, things on this planet would change. All the same, a scarey documentary, and worth watching for the education I received.

Time to rest now ...good night and God bless and keep us safe tonight.

Safe in the House

Well it took me fifteen and a half hours to get here on Saturday, but I made it safely in spite of being so tired that I had to make frequent stops because of drowsiness.

It rained most of the way down, and was torrential as I drove the 435 in the dark. This was exactly what I had wanted to avoid, since I don't see that well driving at night. But I lived , with another fear biting the dust, and my courage and faith strengthened a bit even as I asked the Lord the point of doing it this way.

Yesterday was spent right here, in my favorite spot. Safe in the arms of Love. It feels so good to be back in such a safe place.

Life in the Spirit is so rich here, and many friends were happy to see me. Something extremely rare for me in the 'Peg.

Mostly though, I am experiencing so much peace, like I have never known before. It is so easy to let the Lord sweep me up in His embrace, and just rest there. Just to BE with Him. No striving, so heavy oppression to fight through now, just rest.

I have to admit the journey down was one where I felt resistance all the way to the border of Iowa. That's through the two states of North and South Dakota. It just reminded me that the last few months have been a great struggle, and some of those things did not want to release me from their grip.

Breakthrough met me , and the heavens opened once again.
I will try to get as much prayer room time as I am able, to let the refreshing Life of Jesus fill ever part.

Meet Ruth

Today as I finished my 'time' at work, I took a few pictures of some of my favorites.
My friend Ruth. Tuesdays at noon. I would come to her door, where her loving family have placed bright green shamrocks , so she would know it was her door.
Ruth would offer me cookies or seven up, ask me to 'sit' and chat. I would eventually get my work done on time.

I noticed all the little notes placed around her apartment. This light switch turns off the bathroom light. etc. and I knew. I knew by the trembling inside of me and the sadness dawning upon me, as I became aware of the long and heartbreaking road this family will walk.

I will treasure knowing Ruth . This is another 'Lady' Jesus has used to change my life and my path. It has been a very good experience in many ways, with the exception of the physical strain on my body.

Yesterday, I was feeling so tired and silly , not to mention sick with a cold. I gripped my trusty toilet brush, and bending down once again over 'the bowl', I chuckled to myself and came up with a new name for myself. 'The Lady of the Bowl' and the brush was my sceptre. I cracked myself up !

I remember in the winter, thinking how long oh Lord? Will this season never end? Really it hasn't been that long, time wise, just heart wise.

The benefits have been bursting to the surface within me this last week.
There was a comment on my last post by my friend Greg Burnett

It went like this. I hear Jesus walking with you. And I see you ministering to Him in His 'distressing disguise'. (cf. Mother Teresa)

I was totally undone. His distressing disguise.

Suddenly these words put a whole new light on the words of Isaiah 53.

He has no form or comliness; And when we see Him there is no beauty that we should desire Him.
He is despised and rejected by men, a Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. And we hid as it were our faces from Him;
He was despised and we did not esteem him. Surely He has born our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed Him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted.

Now I really want to 'see'. I want to be aware of the 'distessing disguise' of my Beloved as He walks this planet today, gazing into my eyes from the face of someone like my friend Ruth.

Maybe I really am the 'Lady of the Bowl', and instead of the toilet brush , I will exchange it for a basin and a towel. I will once again go to the low places, where I may, by loves gaze meet my Beloved in more lovely people like those I have encountered and served these last few brief but stunning months.

Tonight I will pack and early tomorrow head 14 hours south to the Prayer Room. It feels like coming Home again. Thank You Jesus for all You have started to begin in me.

Life Changing Ladies

These are the ladies that the Lord used to change and ultimately re-direct the whole focus and purpose of my life. My Aunt Kay in the wheelchair and my little Aunt Teresa. Two loving sisters , now re-united in heaven.

My Aunt Kay had Alzheimers disease, and I still remember how radically affected I was when I visited her with Aunt T. back in 2003. So many elderly and seemingly forgotten people, locked in a terrible world of forgetfullness , forgotteness, fear and lonliness. All dignity gone, as they have no control of their bodily functions. It's like infancy all over again, only the Door to eternity is standing open nearby.

Maybe it's true that those who suffer from this disease, are not aware in the later stages, but I cannot help but wonder. These are human beings who end their lives sitting for hours, alone and lost in hallways and lonely rooms of nursing homes. Many family members stop coming to visit for whatever reasons.

Today, my friend Ruth (one of my tenants) from my work, and her daughter gave me a box of chocolates as a going away thank you gift. Ruth seems to have early Alzheimers. I love this lady. I am sad when I think of the long journey ahead of her and her children.

When I go Ontario, I hope to pursue this field of serving the senior community. Today when I hugged Ruth, I knew I wanted to care for people like her.
There is a company called Home Instead Senior Care. This is who I have an interview with.

They provide services one on one, similar to what I did for my Aunt T. The pay is not great, but they use caring people like myself. I am not professionally trained to be a home care provider, but this is the next best thing for people like me to be hands on helpers. Cooking meals, light housekeeping, shopping, doctor's appointments etc. that kind of thing. So, we will see how that developes.

If I could be trained to look after Alzheimers patients, I think that is what I would choose, or palliative care. It's really the Lord who will prepare the way, and me as well.

I have rented a room in a home there, who will let me have Sam . This is a university town, so rooms are plentiful. The Lord has been so Faithful. I feel the need to travel light these days for some reason, so I will not take any of my own furniture.
Kind of reminds me of 'sell all you have and follow Me.'

There is an emphasis today on the younger generation being called and trained up by God for the days spoken of in Joel. When the Lord pours out His Spirit, it will be on ALL flesh, and that's the old flesh as well.

When I am with the elderly I am the youngster, and I get a kick out of that. These dear souls are as vital to Jesus as any of us, and He has begun to put this on my heart. Eternity is at the door for many of these I see every day, and that makes my prayers seem more urgent . So I am going, and I will pray, and see where the road takes me.

Trusting

The journey continues. I have one more week of work here. This time next week I hope to be sitting in the House of Prayer in Kansas City, for a time of refreshing and preparation.

When I return here, I will be deep in packing my dwindling belongings, in preparation for my journey to Southern Ontario. Peterborough to be exact, my home town. The Lord has provided a place for me to stay, and a job interview when I get there. The next step forward into unknown territory again.

I am learning to trust. My time here has been a difficult one in many ways. Through the trials, there has come a new depth in my relationship of intimacy and devotion with My God and Father.

I would not change this for anything. He has given me Courage,and Strength. He has been my Refuge, my Wisdom and my Joy. My Father, and my God !
I am learning about prayer. I am learning about how very desperately the Heart of God desires to make Himself known and real to His children, you and me.

Maybe, He feels like I do at times. I wish my children would want to know the real me. I don't mean the roles I filled while raising them and caring for them. During those years I poured my life into them and my God. Absolutely no regrets there. Ever!

The season has changed. Children are grown, living their own lives. Busy, very busy. I am alone, but not really. My Beloved never leaves me. We are on a journey.
I am definitely leaning, completely leaning. It's a good feeling most of the time, but then there are these moments when it is absolutely terrifying, and sad.

Terrifying to be homeless again, in a sense. Sad to be leaving my beautiful grandchildren. This is a challenge for all of us. The Lord knows my heart breaks with love for Anneka and Aila, Jared and Ryan.

When Anneka was still an infant, there were times when she would look at me, her big blue eyes would absolutely twinkle with joy, and my heart would leap within me. When she was born, I felt my heart leap the first time I held her, only minutes after she burst into this earth from the Heart of God. What a joy!

Aila, loves to sit with me, and likes to hug and talk and talk to Grandma. Just to be with me. This one too, I held for many hours in prayer, singing and coming into the Presence of Jesus, while her parents led the worship team. So much love and joy. These girls run to me with hugs and smiles, always so happy to see me.

I know God likes this when we stop what we are doing, and just sit with Him and give Him our love. He wants to show us more and more Who He really IS. He loves to show us His smile, and His eyes twinkle when He catches our gaze.

These children will not understand the leaving. I hope that someday, the Lord will reveal to them that Grandma was not crazy, but that she was following the Lamb, intimately, where He has called her to go.

It's not so crazy to imagine that He would have a mission for one such as I. It took Him some convincing to get this through to me. Remembering Sarah and Abraham, leaving the familiar to follow the Voice and the Vision. Not easy, but I have become willing.

I am not looking for happiness, that is an illusion that the world lures us with. True happiness has come FOR ME in my day to day walk with Jesus, through the storms of life on this planet, discovering His Faithfulness, Nearness, and Passion for me.

We walk on together, with joyful anticipation in the journey. Firmly held in His Heart and confident in His Covenant of Love He died to establish with me. I am willing to leap again.

It is Time

YOU are worth everything it took to get here.

OPEN !

Lift up your heads O you gates ! Be lifted up you everlasting doors !
And The King of Glory shall come in !

After these things I looked, and behold, a DOOR Standing OPEN in Heaven .

I wonder what Heaven was experiencing That Day, as they watched the plan of the Father being unfolded upon the earth ?
I wonder, was there silence and weeping as they beheld the Perfect Lamb being sacrificed ?

I wonder, did everyone hold their breath as He descended into hell taking back the keys ?
I wonder about the moment Father gave the Word, and Power Flashed like Lightning into the Beloved broken lifeless human frame lying in the tomb .

I wonder at the 'Sound' as Resurrection Life Exploded into the Earth and Heaven's Doors flew wide open.
Did You stand there Father, Your Arms that have longed to hold us close, now extended wide in anticipation of that first embrace ?
Me too !

That must have been some Party Lord ! We are still celebrating. Thank You for smiling upon us today .

Have I told You Jesus that I love Your Smile !

A Worthy Message

I found a wonderful and timely message posted here
Check her out.

True Value

I've been waiting a long time, to break this alabaster box.
Jesus You're Worthy of all of my love.
I am not ashamed to waste my life on You.

Flood

Change of Plans

I have decided to listen to Wisdom, and wait until the flooding subsides before I make the trip south.

Way too much water for this girl! It is over the I 29 in some places and I don't want to endanger myself or my car, so, I will wait until May.

Funny. I guess that's why I could not get excited about it, though I did buy Pam her Ketchup chips.

On the bright side, the Robin's are here !

Home to the House

I am planning on heading down to my favorite seat in the "House" this Thursday.

In the meantime my prayer is that Interstate 29 remains open and free of flood waters in Grand Forks and Fargo.
Going for ten days of refreshing and rest, and to pick up the things I left there in December.

Tonight was a delightful evening of worship and prayer at the new Sanctuary House of Prayer.

Heard a good word today. When God comes in His Majesty it's not something He puts on. It's Who He IS .

Springing Forth

The other day I was wondering if God moves His clock ahead. Does He 'spring forward'?
Is there a timing in God, that we need to be aware of ?
Over the years I have known that this is true, and that I need to be considering His timing while in the midst of planning my own life.

Hey! I wonder if the 'change of life' or the big M,(yes, men go through it too) is a very long,( for some of us,) 'season' of transition that we experience. Why ? Maybe, so that we can take courage knowing that sometimes the seasons of God seem not only unending, but are filled with turbulence. But I digress.

The following three verses in Isaiah speak of God's change into new seasons:

Is. 46:6. You have heard; see all this! And you , Will you not declare it?
I have made you hear new things from this time, even hidden things which you have not known.

Is. 43:19 Behold, I will do a new thing. Now it shall spring forth; Will you not be aware of it? I will even make a roadway in the wilderness, rivers in the desert.

Is.42:9 Behold, the former things have come to pass, now I declare new things; before they spring forth I proclaim them to you.

Notice the phrase spring forth in the last two verses? These words mark a shift in time. Something new is about to spring forth. Will you not be aware of it He asks.

Often God waits until the last moment to move. But it is also true that when He does move, it can transpire quickly.

I want to understand and recognize the divine shifts in my life. Moments when God changes the times and the seasons. I want to be alert and flexible . I want to be ready.

Some of the above is from a book by Dutch Sheets, God's Timing for Your Life.

God's time is moving forward hour by hour, minute by minute.There are multitudes that seem to think they can live by any schedule they choose and that in their own time , they can turn to God. But His time is the right time.

Justice

Justice .... 1.n. a being righteous, 2. fairness. 3. rightfulness.4. reward or penalty as deserved 5.the use of authority to uphold what is just.

That is the cry of my heart today. A senior lady and her husband come to the dining room for breakfast.
The housekeeper assigned to clean their suite enters to clean while they are at their meal.(not this housekeeper)

During the meal, the lady has a 'accident', and has to be removed by her husband.
Once inside their suite, the husband takes his wife of very many years, into the clean bathroom, in order to clean her up. This man then proceeds to shout abuse and profanity at this lady, already very humiliated, while cleaning her.

Why is he angry I wonder? Is he scared ? Has the reality of the decline of his wife's health pushed him to the edge? Why is he taking his rage out on the one who can not fight back because she needs him to help her ? I do not know their story.

This evening at dinner time, they exit from the elevator. She is seated on her walker, and he is pushing her to the dining room. He curses because he is having difficulty . I glance at the woman and see a frightened silent captive.

Anger burns in my heart towards the man. I try to talk to the Lord about this. I am not to judge anyone. But my blood boils at the thought of this lady being humiliated by her husband.

Justice Lord! Come and make things right. We need you so desperately . We are animals of destruction without You. Our potential for destroying each other scares me. Man without God....the human heart without the Creator of that heart dwelling inside.

Unthinkable agony, for the Heart of the Savior who is also the only Righteous Judge, as He observes His Creation in such a state.

Yet He restrains himself , yet again, for the sake of mercy.
He alone knows the fullness of the reality that awaits the lost. So He restrains.

He observes with gut wrenching sobs the abuse of this life He created, yet he restrains a little while longer.

I still must cry out for the Judge to come. How desperately we need Him. That little terrified lady needs Justice to fight for her. (At least I can pray.)

Yes, he is a Terrifying Judge, but He is also the Lamb slain in our place, who took our judgement upon Himself. A Wonder of Salvation this Judge, and a Terror for those who decline His Invitation to Life. Is.63.

After I finished posting this rant, I was heading of to bed, when the lyrics to an old Daivid Ruis song rang inside of me. I had to get up and come back to it.

"I STAND IN AWE OF A GOD, WHO'S HEART IS RAVISHED OVER FALLEN MAN. WASHED IN THE POWER OF INNOCENT BLOOD, IT'S COVERING ALL OF MY SIN, AND I COME ....I COME."

I Wonder

I wonder if God turns HIS Clock forward ?

If He does , what would that look like ? I wonder ?

Homesick

Like the tide pulled to the depths of the ocean, so too my heart and soul respond to the shifting I feel in the depths of my being.

Overwhelming me, Your Voice hovers.
"Come, Come, away with Me."

"Draw me Away. I just want to be where You are.
Take me in to Your Secret Place."

"Listen oh Daughter, incline your ear.
The King, desires your beauty. Come away."

"I'll draw you with cords of loving kindness.
I'll draw you away. Will you arise?"

"Beauty Arise, Come away with me.
Listen Oh Daughter. Come away with me."

"Every thing that hinders Love,
Remove it. All those comprimises, remove it.
Catch those little foxes."

"Come away with Me, leave it all behind."
Will you Arise? Will you Come Away?"

"I say you are lovely,
You are Mine."