As The Seasons Change

The thing I am so grateful for is the way that the Lord provided Ann and her home for Sam and I, well , mostly Sam . Ann has a tender and compassionate heart and was so very good to my Sam, and because of her loving nature, the last year of Sam's life was spent in a gentle and friendly environment. The most fun was his discovery and enjoyment of the squirrel population in the back yard .



So the season changed when I lost Sam . I tried to run from the pain of the memories by trying , to no avail , to find another place to live right after his passing.
The Lord knows best and I'm still learning to trust him day by weary day.
I miss my little buddy and the fact that life goes on does not make me feel any better. Still... what passes for living these days is not exactly Real Life either.

Tonight I sat with my client Min as he was distressing over his deteriorating mental state. 'I guess the only thing for me to do is to go to bed'.
He wasn't really tired but his brain is dying and he can't focus his mind so it gets him down. He is getting worse and we all see it.

Today he called it 'mind sickness'. Sometimes I wonder what it must be like from the inside though I pray I never find out. Once he called it 'black velvet'.
My heart broke for him tonight as I cried out for mercy to meet him .

I remember something a friend said to me once.

'I see Jesus walking with you in His distressing disguise.' It is a quote from Mother Teresa, but ever since , there are times when I am more aware of this than others and tonight was one of those times.

Eternity is very near in that home these days and I wonder where I will be when the Unseen becomes the Reality for all of us there. I wonder if it will be on my shift ? I am so selfish when it comes to trying to get my rest , I pray mercy will be with all of us when the moment comes.