This is the truth, that I am in the grip of a mighty wrestle. At first I would be tempted to accuse God, that He in His Sovereign Wisdom, has set me down in a barren place to die one way or another.
Upon more serious reflection though, I find that I am the one doing the accusing of myself, trying to find out where I may have missed it.
Living unoffended with the Lord can be a challenge. No wonder we are tested.
In the process of my journey I have shut myself down. What I mean is that I have chosen to keep silent and not speak of the Lord very much, because of the fact that I have no control over who reads my blog, and also that I cannot make myself clear sometimes, and that sometimes I have felt mocked by misunderstanding, with eyes rolled back in heads in wonder at the lady who is totally 'meshugge.'
In the past I have chosen to be vulnerable and let the Lord flow and speak whatever I felt He was saying to me. It was therapeutic to sit at my computer, and let Jesus whisper to my heart and He would enable me to find words sometimes to share.
Recently, I read a post by my friend Mair a.k.a. Ragamuffindiva and she spoke on the nakedness that the Lord had commanded Isaiah to walk in literally. Is.20:2.
So I am going to challenge myself to try to walk in more truth and feedom. Afterall, if anyone does not like what I am writing, they just don't have to read it.
So Lord...I will try to open my heart again.
1 comment:
I will email my response to this blog as you said, everything that is written can be misunderstood.
love you
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