God ....if You are doing anything on the earth right now
I want to be a part of it !


Read this on Randy's blog this morning and must shout out my agreement.

The last couple of days in reminiscing with my brother Rob, he reminded me of some funny stories.

When we were kids, our mother had to work, same for our dad. Mom worked at a place called the Bonner Worth Woolen Mill , and all I remember was that some times she would bring us home the ends of the skeins, and huge chunks of chalk like the kind used by children today as sidewalk chalk.

Sometimes her shift required her to be gone at different times, so since I was the oldest it fell to me to babysit. I might have been around 8 - 10, can't really remember. At that time there were myself, Rob, Joanne and Michael and Darlene came along later..

Anyway, Rob remembered that one time I made 'cooked pudding' for dessert( before the advent of instant) and dyed it green , but the kicker is I decorated each bowl, by putting each of our initials on top.....with toothpaste !!!!

As he told me this, there was a flicker in my brain of remembrance ....
yep...I guess I did. Wasn't that domestic of me !


Couldn't find a picture with toothpaste initials on it.

This same brother used to chase me with the broom....or was that me chasing him...he was such a little terror, that I do remember. The memory that stayed with me forever was when he would chase me with a feather out of the pillows and for many many years I had a deep fear of moths.

I am happy to report, the Lord has healed that great terror for me .....once I realized they crumble to dust when you whack them with a good and thick rolled up newspaper, no not a fly swatter, too close contact...has to be a thick item for plenty of distance between my hand and his flaky body....I call that a healing anyway. No way do I let the little monsters live.....yep I'm healed alright.

There are likely many more humorous memories hidden away beneath the not so good ones that like to try to dominate.

I am told everything is in there... the memory that is. Once while having an MRI I totally remembered something as the ions were messing with my frame, and after that big magnet was shut down, it was gone . So weird.

It's Just How I Feel

Like oil upon Your feet
Like wine for You to drink

Like water from my heart
I'll pour my love on You

If praise is like perfume
I'll lavish mine on You

Till ever drop is gone
I'll pour my love on You

Worship from the prayer room by Misty Edwards overwhelming my heart as well.

Reflection

The last five years of my life have held some very remarkable changes and though the journey has been bumpy and I have felt adrift from time to time, over all , the tender hand of the Lord has guided me along.

The fact that many times I was unaware of His Nearness doesn't matter tonight for that season has diminished and a new awareness of the intensity of His Presence has gripped my heart...and I am very glad.

The call to go and take care of my little Aunt T. came in the summer of 2004. That was a difficult challenge, but knowing it was His plan kept me grounded. It was later, after she died, (and went to heaven!)that I carried my grief to the prayer room at IHOP. The knowledge of serving Him in the disguise of my little Aunt T. was a total revelation to my heart and created a desire to pursue care giving .

What a blessing to find myself just a year later caring for my dearly beloved senior couple in Lakefield. Though terribly sleep deprived for the duration of my employment there,that job was the most fulfilling in my life aside from raising my children.

That's the issue I'm trying to ponder .

Fulfillment .

Serving Min and Bertha or more accurately Jesus , again in another of His distressing disguises, was so great for ME. That may have been the whole point the Lord was trying to instill in my heart. Joy in serving others/ Him . Except it was not 'selfless' as is the way Jesus enjoys serving us in endless ways on into eternity.

Now, the job I am employed in is not selfless, and definitely NOT fulfilling in ANY way , except that somewhere in my brain is the knowledge that the Lord has stationed me there , and at least it pays the bills. I am still sleep deprived, but not because dear Bertha needs me, but just because I must get up early to prepare to make a living .

Making a living is NOT fulfilling, at least not in my life. So all I can make of it is the fact that I am maybe being obedient to the Lord, though not very willingly, sad to admit.

When I was at IHOP there was a conference called 'The Joseph Company' and it is aimed at those Christians in the marketplace.
The call was for intercessors . I remember thinking, man, I would love to get paid to be in a job just to pray.

Well, guess what girl??? You are ! You dumb blonde !!!!

So the joke is on me. The thing I didn't realize is that it's way different than the way I wanted it to be and the test is, can I manage to hang in even though it feels so unfulfillable and mostly drives me crazy AND I'm not working for a Christian, which I so naively once thought was the whole point ?

So....one is never too old to learn , just maybe a bit slow in getting the drift of the lesson. I think I need a tutor. Glad my teacher is God .
Is He not so very Wonderful ? He is Unlimited Patience, and I think I see Him with a grin on His Beautiful Face . I love you Jesus sooooo much!

Thank you for loving me so outrageously !

Walking Into Healing

July 21, 2004.......Five years ago a story came to me during my prayer time.
My first entry was....You make all things new.
Do what you have to do , help me to see, help me to hear, help me to rest in what You are doing even though I don't understand.



There was once a girl who lived in darkness . She was not aware that where she lived was a dark place. Well, yes, somehow deep inside she did know she was in a dark place , like a tomb or prison. Since that's what she thought life was she accepted her place without question.

She was very unhappy, but this too she believed was the normal life. No one ever told her about Light, about Life or Love.
All she knew was ... be quiet...don't make them angry, don't make the big dog angry or they will attack you.

All she wanted was to be loved, even though she didn't know what love was. She knew pain, she knew anger, she knew hatred, she knew rejection .
Rejection. Thrown away, despised, no good for anything, that's the lie she believed.

In her dark place this child of Light tried to make everyone happy. They will love me if I'm good she thought...or work...work hard and you can handle the pain.
The betrayal, the fighting, the lies, the fear....don't fight back.

Then one day she heard about a New Man in town. Everyone was talking about Him. It was rumored that this guy was the Son of the King. A Prince, and a good looking guy as well.

I wish the Prince would notice me....the whole town crowded around Him wanting His attention.

Meanwhile the girl watched from a distance. The broken desire of others had crushed her by now, she was used up, empty, used up....a lifetime of trying to survive had ruined her heart and mind. She feared for her mind because her thoughts were so numb now. Dead, she felt broken and dead and afraid. Afraid that she would never live !

Now she was old and forgotten. The Prince seemed busy she thought , too busy to notice an old crone . How did I get so old she wondered ? I want to awaken from the nightmare of this life. Regret of having sold her soul for a roof and food, and her body to preserve her life overwhelmed her heart . Where is the path past the rubble of brokenness....my heart...

Desperation driving her forward she pressed through the crowds just as the Prince turned to walk away and she reached out brushing her fingers against the sleeve of His garment.

The rest is history.....freedom !

As those tender eyes of love embraced her sin sick soul with compassion and forgiveness , healing flowed like warm sunshine and her heart found its home .

And Real Life Began .

July 21, 2005 ....surrounded by Life in the prayer room at IHOP K.C.

July 21, 2006.....back in my home town to begin again.

July 21, 2007.....My best buddy Sam went to puppy heaven.

July 21, 2008.....full time work

July 21, 2009.....looking at life through a different window.

GOD'S APPOINTMENT

"I formed thee... I knew thee... I sanctified thee; I have appointed thee."Jer:1:5

GOD HAS a plan for each of his children.

From the foot of the Cross, where we are cradled in our second birth, to the brink of the river, where we lay down our armour, there is a path which He has prepared for us to walk in.

God also prepares us for the path He has chosen. We are His workmanship, created unto the good works which He has before prepared.
There is no emergency in the path for which there has not been provision made in our nature.

From the earliest inception of his being, God had a plan for Jeremiah's career, for which He prepared him.

Ask what your work in the world is, that for which you were born, to which you were appointed, and on account of which you were conceived in the creative thought of God.

That there is a Divine purpose in thy being is indubitable. Seek that you may be permitted to realize it, and never doubt that you have been endowed with all the special aptitudes which that purpose may demand.

(F.B. Meyer devotional from e-sword.)

Isaiah Six

When he saw them veil their faces in adoration, when he discovered the whole universe was filled with God, he remembered his own darkened heart.
F.B. Meyer.

I am undone....

Aila is Six !

Wishing you a very Happy Birthday Aila Darlin'.
Gramma and Zoey love you very much.



Have a blast shopping !

We Now Have Air

Ta Da!!

First though it was necessary to remove the safety rail from in front of the windows.



It just looks like she is not enjoying herself.



I hired Gerry the maintenance man, the husband of Candace and the daddy of Thatch, one of Zoey's buddies to do the work.



I also bought plexiglass to install above the air conditioner so that I would not loose the view. I got that suggestion from the owner of Timber, another puppy friend.





Good job Gerry . Thanks. Now at least if it ever gets hot enough this summer we will not cook in the humidity.

Return to Haliburton

While trying to recover from moving exhaustion ,I decided to visit our friends in Haliburton .
I had been putting this off due to the fact that this city girl does not fare well amidst the kind of insects that prey upon the blood of my puppy and myself, especially in the real country and not just the lawn beside our apartment.

So, it seems that those nasty black flies had been dispersed, only to leave way for the Deer Fly. I have to say, these are also very mean and nasty . They dive bomb any unsuspecting creature , buzzing very loudly , angrily taking aim at any exposed hide available . I have been told they can cause deer to come charging crazily out of the bush trying to find relief.

Well,when it came time to take Zoe out for her night duty,( I did have a safe animal insect repellent for her, thanks to Carol and Bud.)
I was somewhat apprehensive until my friend came up with the gear she uses to keep from being a bugs meal.



Works quite well, though not terribly attractive , and they tell me the next bad bug coming is the Horse Fly.

How do these folks handle putting up with all this ?

Hmmmmm....I may just have to stay here in the city for a while longer. Yep....I'm a wuss!

Update

It has been a very long and busy two weeks at least. Last week I took the week off to prepare for and do the actual moving process from the forth to the seventh floor. For three days prior to move in I transferred many carts of boxes and smaller furniture by myself.



Then good friends and family helped me move the heavier furniture. One thing I have been reminded of is the fact that I am getting much too old to be moving my furniture around, changing my mind, moving it again, changing my mind....you get the picture...

During most of the confusion Miss Zoe found herself a soft and safe place to try to cope with the chaos.



The previous view from our window.



The present view.


A perfect place to watch the fireworks on July 1st. sitting on my bed.


Then after a deep breath I was blessed to be able to spend time with some special people . Meet Cailey , the grandaughter of friends of mine from Orillia.



Grandpa Gary and his wife Faye travelled by boat from Orillia to Peterborough on the Trent Severn Canal and docked at Del Crary Park and Marina on Little Lake. The picture of the fountain above is located in the middle of the lake and is also where the fireworks display took place on Canada Day.



Then it was off to a Birthday Celebration with family at my sister's place. I am not allowed to publicly say the age of the Birthday Lady....but her name is JoAnne. Pictured below my sister Darlene, and the other side of me the Birthday girl herself and our cousin Francine from Toronto.



Now it's back to work, and hum drum.....getting used to having to get up too early in the morning and make a living somehow or other. I think I prefer busy.

Archive Photo

This picture of my dad was taken in 1947 at the Peterborough Exhibition where the radio station he worked for at the time set up a live broadcast booth.

(I was one year young.)

Check out the big 33rpm records and the smaller 78's , long before the advent of the popular 45's of my teen years.