Friday

Today, Sam and I are off to Trenton to visit and care for Lillian for the long weekend.
I am looking forward to major prayer encounters with Jesus in this place.
more later....

Blessed

The Lord has placed me in a home to help care for a senior couple. Mr. is 90 and My Lady is 89 years old. This is a totally different world. Mr. is suffering from Alzheimer's , but he is still able to function in his home. My Lady, has dementia , and uses a walker since breaking her hip last year.

These are a most amazing couple. They have been married 65 years in July, and are still so much in love.

My job has been working from 9pm. to 9am. That means I sleep there, in a room upstairs. There is a monitor that I must keep on in order to listen during the night if my Lady needs to get up. Sometimes, her husband forgets she needs help, and that is when she is at risk of falling.

I wash her and get her ready for bed, then she goes to the couch where she sits holding hands with Mr. and watching t.v. until bedtime. They have been doing this for years. When the time comes for bed, I tuck her in and Mr. gets himself ready. They both have a lovely and spirited sense of humor.

My favorite part of all of this has become their foot care. I love putting the lotion and creams on their feet. Isn't Jesus amazing ? I imagine how a soul can be touched when someone performs this act of care, without guile. I love it!

Jesus has ministered to me in this way many times by His Spirit. I weep with awe, as He gazes into my weary soul, kneels at my bruised and broken feet, washing and kissing me with His touch of loving understanding and compassion. Directing my feet into the less travelled paths, He touchs the forgotten ones, and the ones who have forgotten.

Hope rises in my heart, when I listen in the night. I am in a place of intimacy, as I am priviledged to hear these dear ones whisper rather loudly, (since they are hearing impared, and I have the monitor) their loving 'goodnight kisses.' Even in the state of forgetting, some things , for now, still remain very sure. I am so very blessed Lord.

Mr. will declare every morning at breakfast, "the best thing that ever happened to me is sitting in this kitchen". My Lady giggles like a girl, and returns the sentiment.

There are sad moments to be sure, when Mr. wearily complains how he cannot remember his way around his own house anymore. My heart breaks at his 'troubling'. I wonder silently to God.

The other night, My Lady lovingly declared to Mr. 'we have had an amazingly wonderful life.' his response was, 'Had ? We are in the midst of it!'

It really is another world, and puts this short time here on this planet, in the eternal perspective. Thank You Jesus for this place of priviledge. I love You!

Encounter

Come, and sit with Me awhile. A prayer room encounter with Jesus.

In the midst of the prayer room activity of worship, adoration and supplication, An Unseen Figure sits alone, veiled to human eyes.

I perceive Him sitting , praying to His Father. My heart is immediately drawn to this Man. He is clothed in a dark scarlet colored garment with a hood covering His bowed head.

He doesn't look directly at me , but somehow I feel His invitation to come and sit beside Him for a while.

As I look upon Him sitting solitary, I sense a deep sadness surrounding Him, a lonliness and longing in His prayer. My heart responds with a quickening pulse and I hasten to His side.

His heart draws me in and I am greeted with tender gratitude and welcome. Reaching out, hands touching, my trembling soul bows low as Amazing Love embraces my entire being.

We sit quietly together in His house of prayer. Worship and devotion ascending to His throne. The songs are the songs of the Lamb, declaring His Great Worth, and His great Sacrifice.

He is holding my hand, and with a gentle squeeze, I am tenderly invited to explore the wound I know is there. This is only one of the wounds of Love.

These mighty hands of power and healing. I am in awe as I think again how this God-Man , my Beloved, restrained Himself.
Submitting to men restraining these loving hands, that formed our frame. Held fast with cruel nails upon a piece of wood that He Himself created, for this very purpose.

My salvation. The bridal price.

Now, I know it is my turn. "May I touch your scars Dear One He whispers tenderly?" The fragrance of myhrr surrounds us, and my heart cringes. He knows! I long for His touch even though my fingers are bent and twisted. I am so ashamed that feel I am not beautiful enough for Him.

I remember that He has promised me healing. Still my heart feels the burden of wanting to be pleasing and lovely to this One I love so very much."You see with the eyes of man, my love."

Slowly He reaches in to His Heart. My soul trembles in joyful wonder as He extends to me a beautiful gold ring, and the Cup of Betrothal.

"Are you willing Beloved?" "Will you drink the Cup?" "Oh Yes Lord!"

His Beautiful Face radiates a brilliant smile, and I find myself lost in Love's Gaze, embraced completely in Love Himself. I am undone. Again!

Thank You

I want to say a great big thank you and God bless you to Carol-Ann, Kinza , and Bruce Allen. Your love and kindness to Sam and me these last few days has been a lovely blessing. Good friends are a rich treasure. You are one of mine.

We have enjoyed the peace and relaxation of sitting on the deck basking in the sunshine and warmth of summer, listening to the birds and sharing our hearts in the Presence of Jesus.

We have had a fun time .... and we will be back ! Thanks again my friends.

401 Mercies Lord Please

Tomorrow, Sam and I are off to Toronto for visiting fun with Carol-Ann and family, and some long over due time with my other son and his beautiful lady.

It has been a year since I drove the 401 to Toronto, and I am downloading courage even at this moment. Lord have mercy! I think it's worse than all my trips put together, but I have a feeling I'd better get used to it.

So off we go......

Little 'Faith'...that's me

By faith, Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as an inheritance , obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.
By faith he made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country; He lived in tents.

For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God.
He considered Him Faithful who had made the promise.

Me too..... I consider Jesus Faithful to keep His promise. He's the only One actually able to keep His Promises. Men, well, we fail and break our word to each other with little remorse or care.

When I began this most recent chapter of my adventure with God, I knew it would be a place of decreasing. Willingly volunteering to go to the low place of service with Jesus, I really had no idea what that exactly meant. It's easy to get the notion that we are doing God a favor, by 're-up-ing' as they call it at IHOP.(re-consecration)

At this point I am vitally aware that this whole thing is so that He can do a work in me, so that when the time comes, He can look at what He has made and see 'His Image' there, and be satisfied. I have no idea where I am in this process, and that will likely be the case until I stand before Him in that day to give Him an account of my life.

I feel like I am stumbling around in such foreign territory. What exactly is a walk of faith anyway ?

A few of years ago I heard Patricia King, tell how the Lord removed all sense of His Presence from her for about a year, while all those around her were basking in His Glory. I remember thinking , Thank You Lord that you don't do that to me..... right ? right Lord ? LORD ?

Maybe I should call it learning to walk by the Spirit, that would better explain my dilemma. All I want is to love God, walk with Him in intimacy, and when I die go home to heaven forever. (Don't tell Mike Bickle that I am staying in heaven during the millennium.)

Since my time at IHOP, the Prayer Room IS Home to me. Out here is foreign land. Even here in my home town where I grew up, it is a strange land. The people have not changed, just grown older. God must be here somewhere, but I have no desire to seek out a church or 'fellowship' to see if He is there.

Of course God is here! He is Omnipresent. AND He is present in the little elderly couple who I am giving care to. One has Dementia, and the other has Alzheimers. They have been married 65 years this July, and are still very much in love, sitting every evening holding hands on the couch until bedtime.

The other night as I was preparing my lady for bed, I remembered the words Jesus spoke to Peter , 'that when you are old you will stretch out your hands and others will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.'Jn.21/18.
I am sure my lady never would have thought that at some point in her life someone else other than herself, would dress her and get her tucked in to her bed.

The human frame is weak....I see that so clearly. We go through life flexing our muscles before God , each other, and the world. Then one day, we cannot remember....period. I don't understand any of it. The rain falls on the just and the unjust, the bible says, but all I know is that it makes me sad, very sad.

How am I adjusting ? Some days I catch a glimpse of the 'Banner/Shadow/Love' over me. Other days, I fall down weeping in weariness and discouragement.
I have chosen this path of abandonment to Jesus , but I am only now waking up to the reality of what that committment really entails.

Death! Death to all that hinders Love Himself being formed in my heart and character.
I know I am not alone, that in the midst of the battle, in this place called the world, He is here.
I can sense His nearness in this little hovel of a room, that is strangely becoming familiar. I feel His comfort when I weep with grief because my little dog is dying, and I do not want to let him go. Like my friend Mair has said so beautifully "Love Stays."

Tonight all I am longing for is to sit beside some quiet waters with my Friend Jesus. Just sit really still and let Him hold me close, as we share tears of sorrow over my puppy Sam.
He will raise my chin in His tender hands and open my eyes to behold the starry host that He has placed over our heads in the deep saphire sky. He will remind me of my real Home. Tonight, though the world rages in other places, Sam and I will know Comfort while Love stays with us.

Brief Update

I have started my new job here working for home Instead Senior Care. My clients are very sweet, and the actual work is not difficult.
My problem is that I must listen for activity from their room in the night , in case my lady needs to get up.
Well that's not the problem.... the thing is I am sleep deprived already and I am just starting my third night.
My head is spinning. I think I am getting too old for night work and to not have a rested night .
I don't know what to think at this point, so I will make myself some strong coffee for now. I must be crazy ......Help me Jesus !

Deep Calls To Deep

Deep calls out to deep in the roar of Your waterfalls; All Your waves and breakers have swept over me. Ps.42/7

The waters saw You , O God, the waters saw You and writhed; The very depths were convulsed.
The clouds poured down water, the skies resounded with thunder; Your arrows flashed back and forth.

Your Thunder was heard in the whirlwind, Your Lightning lit up the world; the earth trembled and quaked.
Your path led through the sea, Your way through the mighty waters, though Your footprints were not seen. Ps.77/16-19

I surrender to Your Depths Jesus.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JASON

Thirty three years ago today!!!!!









I love you and I am so proud of you and all you have accomplished. Happy Birthday, my son. Have a great day....with a good birthday cake. Forget the points today.

Check it Out

A wonderful post....a worthy read.

Ragamuffin Diva

Jesus You are Awesome and I love You.